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Police: Burglar Left Feces on Front Porch

After stealing statues, picture frames and dolls, a burglar left feces on the front porch of an Owings Mills home.

A burglar who stole several items from an Owings Mills home left something for the homeowners: feces.

According to Baltimore County Police, a burglar stole a crystal bowl, two crystal golf statues, two picture frames, four or five porcelain dolls and left feces on the front porch of a home on a private road in the Caves Valley Golf Club area in Owings Mills on Sunday, Sept. 30.

Police believe the burglar is somebody known to the victim, but that feces have not been involved in previous incidents.

“Feces on the front porch?” said Lt. Stephen Doarnberger, assistant commander of the Baltimore County Police’s Franklin Precinct. “That’s new.”

The incident occurred between 6:30 a.m. and 11:30 a.m., according to a police report.

Steve October 01, 2012 at 06:13 PM
That should be an easy crime to solve. You have to drive past the security guard to get there
Tim October 01, 2012 at 06:24 PM
I hate to be the one who does DNA analysis on that!
Jackie October 02, 2012 at 08:47 AM
Sounds personal
Sharon G October 02, 2012 at 12:59 PM
Who steals crystal golf statues? That is personal.
John October 02, 2012 at 01:39 PM
The loser.
JDStuts October 02, 2012 at 01:47 PM
What about the poor sap who has to take a comparative sample from a suspect?
Tim October 02, 2012 at 03:01 PM
We won't see this on a CSI episode!
John Doe October 02, 2012 at 05:40 PM
Maybe the burglar heard a noise and it scared the sh-- out of him/her.
Gomer Pyle October 02, 2012 at 06:59 PM
The getaway car wasn't the only thing that left skid marks. I'm assuming the turd burglar didn't wipe himself........
Steve October 03, 2012 at 06:43 PM
Even if they do solve the case of the "Dastardly Defecator" Caves will probably squash it to avoid the publicity.
Zoobie October 04, 2012 at 01:04 AM
Sounds like a bunch of S*&% to me ! Line 'em up and take a swab Danno.
John October 07, 2012 at 06:55 PM
Well aint that some shit

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